Don’t ever be creative at work

02Nov07

Everyone I know wants a creative job. I’m going to tell you why it’s a bad idea.

1. You don’t own the fruit of your labor. The unpaid intern who came up with Beavis and Butthead ended up fired and the company made millions of him.

2. Companies don’t care about you and your needs. They especially don’t care what it takes for you to be creative. They won’t buy you the right kind of pen or outfit your workspace with the right kinds of light, or support you. They think you’re lucky not to be the accountant and you can live off the high of being creative.

3. Companies are pragmatic. They’re also vampires. They want to drain you of your energy and exhaust you so they can replace you with an unpaid intern they can make millions off of.

So what should you do if you’re creative?

1. Hide your ideas until you can find a fair price for them. Depending on what they are and their market potential, you should negotiate. Or for goodness sakes, freelance!

2. If you’re a creative person, be creative during your spare time and not at work. And  don’t tell anyone at work about it. Share your ideas with one friend you can trust and possibly your sig other, but only if you’ve been dating them forever and have a very harmonious relationship with them.

3. Don’t do anything at work that you aren’t getting paid to do. Time is money , and, of course, great ideas are even more money. Your employers don’t deserve them

Why am I bitter?

Answer: 

My work has translated directly into success for companies I’ve worked for. Being young and stupid, I thought it might translate into a bonus. No. Not only did they low-ball my salary, they also laughed about how much they were draining me behind my back. (Behind my back until I found out and realized how stupid I’d been. I can’t really blame them. I was not valuing myself properly.)

My old company has a blog I created and worked on, and they recently won an award for it, which makes me feel depressed, because I’m with them anymore. I left that company after stewing in their miserable, dysfunctional environment, and leaving to find myself in a truly dysfunctional environment. The former company used to tell us not to cash our checks until the week after. The new company paid us on time, but my manager was really inappropriate with me and I felt unsafe with him around, so I left when I needed to.

So become an accountant or tax lawyer. It’s the only way to stay far away from the political and dysfunctional atmosphere of “creative industries.”
SORT OF RELATED: Career Guru Marty Nemko writes about creativity at work.

Filed under: Money, Work   |  1 Comment
Tags: burned out, creative jobs, creative work, creativity, fleeced, Work